Of all the time in my life, honestly this is the most challenging moment. When I am young and naive (not that I am no longer this!), I always thought that the adults and experience people are absolutely poyo for giving this statement - “When you grow up, you’ll be busy chasing everything and yet forgetting everything you own let alone, to be in the moment and lastly regretting it. So, enjoy better your life.”
Aku macam, hmm yeah yeah whatever.
But then, recently life kicks the hell out of me. Well actually, since a few months ago. Till recently, I could not bare the pressure any more. THE MOST MASSIVE ULTIMATE breakdown I have ever experience. Haa gittuw dia punya exaggeration! I really do not have specific reasons to why it happened. I guess I was compressed a little to hard that even small things that don't go my way could tear me down. Another issue apart from the breakdown is, you got to play along and show happy me to the world! Tu yang paling susah kot! At this point, faking isn't going to work. But that's the least you can do to conceal kan sebab outsiders takkan tahu (actually more to you dont want them to know). Not even insiders. Unless if you really barged in, because who would ever show the pain kan? I definitely would not.
Tapi alhamdulillah lah sekarang recovering. The fact that I would want to open up on my problem is a good sign kan. Thank you to the Al Mighty for still blessing me with beautiful souls that care about me so much! Hikmahnya, at my lowest point, I get to know how much people loves me and truthfully, I now value my love ones even more!
Sekadar bercakap melalui pengalaman, andai kata kawan kawan anda tu at the state like me. You hug them! Give cliche quotes or kata kata semangat, because Lillahi "life must go on" and "be strong, as a leader EQ kene tinggi" really comforted me! MashaAllah, especially to those yang hidup jauh dengan family, and friends je yang kita ada. Selalu lah amal amalkan. It might help the well being of others, in a way that it would help yours. Trust me. Sekarang ni, take your phone and call them tanya khabar! Go now! Don't care how awkwardly and how long you guys have not being in touch with them. You might discover something hehe.
Remember this, orang yang selalu ceria tak semestinya tak sedih :)
Another one thing, back to basic, to Allah!
P/S: Ini baru ujian mental hidup sebagai mahasiswi. Not yet to deal about love ones leaving for good. Hopefully when the time comes, I will be ready and prepared :’(