Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Rezeki tertangguh

Aku kembali menulis & will straight forward jump to my rant slash advice slash however you take it but certainly not perlian. 

Dalam hidup ni, bukan semua kita boleh dapat. People always say Allah will either give you now, later or better. And it's always hard to practise the advice we give to others kan. Kata orang sebab bukan kau yang rasa boleh lah cakap. Bukan macam tu?

One thing i can tell & share with you, last year (third year degree) wasnt the best year of my life. I wasnt dealing with life and challenges well. I felt like i had to readapt with my life, studies was pretty hard & i have other responsiblities with work and all the people under me. I failed to balance my life, i failed to manage time, i failed amost every aspect in my life. & being far away from family wasnt any of a help. It took a personal toll on me and i swear i was losing the essence of being the Amirah! At the outside, everyone would see the same me. But in the inside, im slowly changing. I am no longer cheerful, no longer want to socialise. I constantly cry when i am alone (as though crying is my hobby) and at one point i skipped class the whole week & wasnt me anymore. Like a lunatic very depressed person. 

But everything is long gone and ive realised how bad i was when it's too late. Alhamdulillah im ok now. I learnt that kita perlu sentiasa BERSABAR dengan ujian Allah dan BERSYUKUR kerana masih disayangi Allah. I regret not cherishing every moment in last year that when I looked back throughout the year, i can barely remember what i did - cuz i was busy being sad. 

Year 3 - only sad moments. 

Such a waste! 

I want to tell you my friend, you were with me when I was like that, I understand your frustrations (cuz now am feeling so frustrated youre being this.) & let me tell you, how much i appreciate you for being there. Maybe you dont get what you want now. But there is so much blessings in the world that you own and cant count. These times are hard but i promised you to be your side.

Sabar dan beryukur, ok?

Nak masuk final year dah. In two weeks time i'll be heading back to the Uk. Hopefully everything is all rainbow and sunshine haha (or at least most of the time!)